It’s late, everyone is asleep and the enemy begins to speak. He says, “all those times you prayed for his protection upon that situation, and look what HE allowed happen”, this is Satan working against me, a land mine of deceit is being planted within my own heart, which I am now stepping onto. I can lift my foot and die, or I can allow God to help me diffuse and remove it.
According to Jeremiah 17:9, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?”
As I sit in my slightly darkened dining room late at night, I place my forehead on the table, hands folded on the back of my head. A ferocious battle has begun in my mind starting with that statement. The deceiver goes on to say, “you trusted him all that time, what did he do – nothing”. He’s getting further into my head. I find myself becoming angry and I boldly confess to God in the spirit, “I am so angry, yet I love you so much”. That still small voice speaks love, truth and knowledge toward me, tears begin to flow down my face.
The enemy’s goal for me, curse God. My verbal response is to my God, “I still trust you God, Jesus is Lord”. I sense the enemy is yelling but I can no longer make out his words nor do I care to hear what he has to say. I’m hurting in this moment, I only care to hear the words of my Father and my Lord Jesus.
On my phone I have youtube music playing the usual songs from my usual mix. As I’m fighting this battle, this particular video, that isn’t typically in my mix, finds its way into the playlist. God begins to highlight words of truth, He is always with me.
On the way into work this morning I thought to myself, I’d like to hear that song again. I pull on into the gas station to fuel up and on my way out the radio plays it next. God, you are always good, I can trust you, and you will never let me down.